Trump’s death postponed for the launch of this newsletter
"What the f*** am I talking about?" — a question steeped in self-awareness and posed so infrequently by those in content creation that it feels almost sinful.
I’m about to give you a taste test from the regular Who Broke It menu. We can call it divine timing — that the internet delivered a shipment of the ripest, juiciest content fodder I could ever hope to feature in a kick-off post. Topline is: Trump is certainly alive and uncertainly well. But before we get to death, let me run you through a recent life cycle that brought me here. I promise I won't start all the way at the beginning.
When the hallucinogenic haze of the 2024 election cleared, so too did my editorial clarity as a young (not really) journalist (sort of) covering Trump 2.0. Or at least, that’s what I expected to happen. Instead, I felt like most consumers of news and politics — always on my backfoot, perpetually trying to catch up, oscillating between baffled and bewildered from the time I got up ‘til the time I went to bed.
It was pretty much a waking nightmare. So I had to get real with myself. I could continue to flop or I could find a new focus and dominate it. My relentless — and oftentimes punishing — curiosity paired with my compulsive online media consumption guided me to the heartland of the new political content frontier: The White House briefing room’s New Media Chair.
No, I haven’t physically occupied it myself. Yet. But I noticed my own deeply disturbing familiarity with virtually every guest who warmed that newly-minted seat. What’s worse: I understood the root and genesis of each story they mentioned. Like ‘Benny Johnson asks about Big Balls receiving the presidential medal of freedom’ unfortunately means something to me.
So I had a choice: continue to dig in my heels and pretend like political media was going to magically self-correct sometime in the future … or crawl deeper into the crevasse, like Jack Donaghy told me to. My brain has already been broken by six years on the job and an average of 8+ hours of screen time a day. Why not make it all worth it so the rest of you can keep your brains intact? [Please clap.]
Creators are our future as much as the old heads would like to pretend they’re not. Hell, I think it’s fair to say they’re clearly our present too. They moved the needle on their first election in 2024, but certainly not their last. They generate more eyeballs in a day than cable news networks do. They host events and build communities that engage more young people than party establishments do. They generate conspiracy and gatekeep truth in a way that simply demands our attention.
So I’ll explain to you why it’s so important (and entertaining) that the only Gen Z congressman invited one of the world’s most prolific streamers to the Capitol. I’ll watch and report back on the 90-minute interview with the guy leading the whites only community in Arkansas. I’ll catalogue the constant cannibalizing on the Left. And of course, I’ll walk you through an abridged version of the Trump funereal fantasy frenzy. As a treat.
DEATH BECOMES HIM
FROM THE LEFT WING:
WELCOME TO BLUEANON: Yeah, like QAnon. Liberals are redefining the five stages of grief. Speculating first: about random road closures near Walter Reed, Trump family posting less, that he had a major stroke, that someone else is writing his Truths. Vague referencing: talking about him dying without saying it, saying he was just a kid, lamenting a repeat of DNC disappointment. Joking: calling him Gon-ald, warning Vance is gonna strike again. Fully melting down: posting in all caps to prepare, admitting they’re spiraling, saying he’s been poisoned, blaming the media for a cover up. And finally, cope. Really, really insane cope. Like flaunting the skinny ankles and overall health of Joe Biden — a man who has aggressive prostate cancer. Grass feels incredible to touch this time of year. I’m begging you to check it out.
FROM THE RIGHT WING:
HURT PEOPLE HURT PEOPLE: Because poetic justice takes no days off, tons of MAGA faithfuls spent the week finger-wagging over nasty treatment of Trump. These are many of the same people, like Charlie Kirk, that spent years speculating about Biden’s health (and ultimately being vindicated). They called it “classless,” “demonic,” a “double standard,” and “hypocritical” (referencing the lack of media availability by “Cabernet Kamala”). But it’s not all lockstep, as is the case more and more frequently it seems. Those who dared question the president’s health, got hit with the r-word from his ally.
Now that I’ve told my Joker origin story … the fun can start. You’ll see me in your inbox every Tuesday and Thursday starting on September 9th. I can’t wait to dig into the creator-fueled chaos with you!