If it’s not cancel culture … what is it?
This timeline couldn’t be more surreal if Salvador Dalí painted it.
Hey so what’s happening right now is literally crazy — feel like I should just get on the record with that first. In case I’m somehow your digital Paul Revere, shaking my bell, breaking this news: first, I’m impressed. And second, I’ll give you a very brief abstract.
Jimmy Kimmel — someone almost no one thinks is funny, I’m discovering, regardless of ideology — has been pulled from ABC’s programming slate after pressure from not only conservative content creators, but from the chair of the FCC himself.
I have now listened to the clip that canned Kimmel so many times, I feel genuinely confident that I could monologue it off-book. The sticking point for most was his claim that MAGA was “desperately trying to characterize” Charlie Kirk’s assassin “as anything other than one of them.”
Interestingly enough, the Discourse™️ actually came to a mutually agreed upon starting point (albeit unintentionally). Both sides agree that this isn’t cancel culture. Then everyone apologized, took responsibility, kissed, and lived happily ever after.
What actually happened is the left recognized this broadcast sacrifice as a crucible moment — the one that could finally allow them to call the Trump administration an authoritarian regime with! their! full! chests!
The right, on the other hand, saw the opportunity for a branding exercise. Now, far be it from this group to do unto others what has been previously done unto them. No no, their backlash was something new, fresh, unforgiving. They’re calling it … consequence culture. You’ll never guess who their mascot is.
In this edition: Liberals land on “fascist” — while Cenk Uygur + Adam Mockler call out a big double standard. We’ll go over how Benny Johnson started the fire, but how Barstool Sports is taking it from here.
FROM THE LEFT WING:
MAKING IT OFFICIAL: It’s been hard for creators — and any journalist honestly — to make a call on throwing down the f-word with confidence. It feels like the levee broke today. Just a handful of references I collected: This is “some real fucking fascist bullshit,” “some scary fascist stuff,” and “the merging of state and corporate power is fascism.” Brian Tyler Cohen was clearest of all: “This isn’t the road to fascism, this is what it looks like once fascism has already arrived.”
Others — Marc Maron, Tim Miller, etc. — opted for the a-word instead. Authoritarian.
ROLE REVERSAL: The day was peppered with iterations of “could you imagine if ___ threatened/pushed/went after ___? Ex: Cenk Uygur of TYT’s premise was imagining if Biden demanded every comic who criticized him to be taken off the air. I tend to be wary of this mental exercise because the right isn’t governed by this same reciprocal thinking. But Dems hammered the clear double standard with the case of Fox’s Brian Kilmeade who faced no repercussions for saying homeless people should be euthanized. Adam Mockler’s push to get him fired is edging on 400k views.
CONFIRM CANCELLATION: The parties are gonna share joint custody of boycotts in the national divorce. The Cracker Barrel CEO is passing the torch to Bob Iger to fend this one off. It’s all over TikTok. Young libs are throwing their streaming subscriptions “in the bin with Target and Paramount+” because “the only thing that’s gonna make a difference in this is money.”
FROM THE RIGHT WING:
SETTING THE AGENDA: This is where I do want to give you some more context. Benny Johnson is pretty much the origin point for this affair. He helped the monologue go viral and it was on his show that the FCC chair went viral for threatening ABC. Benny posted six separate videos on his YouTube, racking up 1.2M views between them, all in the past day. He called it “the single proudest moment of my life.”
IN AND OF CONSEQUENCE: I would do anything to be at the meeting of the minds where thought leaders on the right decided that they fuck with the idea and intention of cancel culture but it needs a new name. It’s not cancel culture, it’s consequence culture. Here are 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12 heralds rejoicing in the splendor of their creation.
So how did they apply this “new” framework to Comrade Kimmel? Out of the 14 conservative content franchises I watched today, none mentioned Kimmel’s statements condemning Kirk’s assassination. Two disagreed on whether this is what Charlie would’ve wanted. And one actually advocated for more violence:
“People are gonna ask me again, Steven Crowder, are you advocating for violence? Yes. absolutely. Lawful merciless violence in defense of your person, of your family, of your property [...] You are welcome in our spaces liberals, if you act like us. Any differently, I want to see you dealt with violently.”
THE STOOL WOBBLES: File “internal libertarian coup” under things that would be super fun to watch happen at Barstool. Head Honcho Dave Portnoy posted that cancel culture is only when your past is used against you. (What the statute of limitations is on the crossover from cancel to consequence … who knows). His employees were not having it: “Will you also bend the knee when this shit eventually happens to Barstool?” KFC & Jack Mac were like, “uhhh no this is bad.” Portnoy doubled down. For some reason Rudy Giuliani is involved.
Next thing you know, one of Barstool’s own podcast hosts Kirk Minihane goes absolutely nuclear: “the extreme right are the biggest group of p***ies that has ever existed in America. Led by the duo of @realDonaldTrump and Consequence Culture @stoolpresidente…”
THE PEOPLE IN CHARGE: They’re a whole other shit show to deal with. Meet me in the subscribers-only chat tomorrow, where we’ll get to it all.
LOOSE ENDS:
📰 Something you should read today: What if the “Great Fashion Reset” is a big conservative flop? — Rachel Seville Tashjian at The Washington Post
🥹 Something to make you smile today: I saw the Alabama Shakes last night, who I haven’t seen in concert since 2012. Aside from being the vocalist of our generation (which for some reason you all are too SCARED to admit), she’s fucking hilarious, and she left us with this: “Everybody knows the times we’re living in so I wont go into it … but I’m really rooting for us.” Plus, she hopes you get the job you want. She hopes it pays you double. She hopes the person who likes you says yes. And she hopes your pet stays alive for 35 years. I want this all for you too.
Do we really believe Nexstar didn’t get threatened by the FCC that they would get denied their merger if they didn’t cancel the Kimmel show? 👀
If I had a steady income, I would pay for a subscription, but I don’t so I will just give you my attention and affection❣️